Listening To Kill Or Revive Any Relationship

A MAGIC WAND OF LISTENING.

If you take a moment and bring up in your mind a truly meaningful friendship, what do you notice is the most important quality of interacting with that individual? What do you value in that relationship? What makes it to continue to be enjoyable through the years.

I’ve asked this question often whenever I talk about what makes any relationship meaningful and lasting. Among the answers I hear that in true friendship there’s a chance to confide, there’s a space to be yourself, however you are – you are accepted. In friendship there’s an expectation to be heard, and that is what we ultimately longing to receive from other people, to invest our limited time in interactions with those who have developed the ability to listen.

We All Crave This.

When we are truly listened to, we instantly feel received, we sense that we belong and that gives us confidence to work with our experience as a process in a long sequence of moments that inform our life. We grow.

Have you noticed when we really don’t like someone or disrespect what is being said, we just tune that person out, or distract ourselves with anything to keep our attention away.

Very often when in a conversation, especially when upset, we don’t bother to listen to what is being spoken to us and instead we are waiting for our turn to speak, foolishly hoping that another person will listen.

Most people in dissipating relationships point out to the No 1 cause of a breakdown which is “communication problem”. And it is none other than inability to listen to what is actually being communicated.

How To Shrink A Relationship.

It felt very immediate and fresh, a sense of being completely severed from my relationship partner when I was confessing to her the assumption I made to act upon. It felt as if I was revealing the secret mechanics of my thinking without an agenda to find an excuse or justify a filament of validity of it. I opened myself bare gambling my imperfection for reciprocity in the other — a compassionate acknowledgment for bravery to step from behind bars of self-defense.

I gambled for a deeper connection. I played a cherished treasure of a nearly-always-right self-image for a safe passage to authentic place. I lost. The passage wasn’t safe, but it had brought me revelational perspective on hidden factor that slowly kills all kinds of relationships.

I wasn’t heard. Instead my partner interrupted me to reiterate to me how wrong and off the mark I was in my myopic view of a situation, how invalid my assessment was and I should have known much better. My self-disclosure was used to clobber me on the spot and naturally I felt stupid for attempting. My inspiration to be free from psychological armor, was faced with an armed attack. Of coarse it is an analogy, though it lured me into contemplative opportunity to see the modus operandi of “communication problem” that is the core culprit of all fallen relationships. Not being heard.

What We Want From The Other Is Not To Do Much.

Overtime we define for ourselves that what we want the most out of relationships is good communication. And when we look at what it is with more precision, we find out that is simply to be listened to. And that is not a lot to do. It is quite the opposite – not to do much.

We Are All Alone Unless Someone Is Listening To Us.

When we are in communication, we are not expected to fix anything in what being spoken to us. All what’s needed is our compassionate presence, an unconditional regard for what communication partner is saying. And that is an unspoken acknowledgment that what they are saying has importance.

Intuitively we all know what we need to do next or how make things right in our life situations. Saying them out loud to our partner or friend sometimes all is needed for us to generate internal movement towards action. Therefore more often than not simply to be a witness, being present to someone else’s experience all is required from us listening, to become a catalyst for positive resolution.

Because when we are present without imposing our interpretation, an agenda or a self-repressive pattern projected as an impulse to fix someone, we actually provide an environment of acceptance for whatever the experience is for our partner and it removes inner resistance that keeps the whole structure operational. Healing becomes available naturally by simply listening.

Listening connects.

Genuine listening is required if we are intend on knowing the other person more deeply. When we share an important inner experience with the other, it is critical that the other party is listening intently.

Because what we are attempting to convey is already twice removed from the experience itself, which for that reason will always remain an uncommunicable secret.
Why is that? When we look at it, we are aware that there is an experience that arouses in our consciousness. We attempt to give it a meaning first. After that we do our best to find words that would be closest to conveying the meaning of experience. But those are only scantily attempts for the substitute of the experience itself.

When after so much inner effort to approximate the inner situation with words, we share it with someone we feel bond of trust, and when it is not reciprocated with empathy to give it validity, we feel utter neglect, rejection and disappointment.

Heart-Centered Listening Requires No Fixing.

Now it is clear to see from this point of view what happens if instead of a sympathetic listening, our partner jumps into fixing our thinking mode, thus effectively undermining our courage to share, and destroying all efforts we’ve mustered to convey that which was valuable to us. The bond breaks.

Sometimes we do jump into fixing mode prompted by good intention. We just can’t tolerate seeing the other in pain. Perhaps when listening to something that represents a lot of suffering and emotional discomfort, it could be very painful for us and we are prompted to jump in with advise to rescue the other person from being in a state like that. We need to hold our urge and let the other person find completion and a relief naturally through the confession they attempt to confide in us.

There’s one more challenging scenario where listening skill is of very high value. It is when someone trying to communicate to us what they did wrong, or something they are remorseful about. Very often there’s a tendency to take advantage of the open door of self-disclosure. We prompted to walk in triumphantly driven by a conquest of rightness and start pointing out to their responsibility, to where they were wrong and should do better.
Well, if we do that we need not expect to find this person to confide in us again — the confidence is broken.

Listening With The Heart.

  • When in communication, remember that this as a precious opportunity to build relationship with the other.

To discover the right measurements of the medication one ends up with no cure to http://deeprootsmag.org/2012/12/12/bob-marovichs-gospel-picks-3/ online sildenafil it or facing the side effects, and so on. Cenforce Doesn’t Help Treat cialis generic usa Premature Ejaculation Cenforce XXX doesn’t help treat the problem of premature ejaculation. Oral pill is cheaper than all other branded viagra 25mg online . Anxiety evolves into a disorder purely because the body has effectively become accustomed to being best price for levitra anxious regularly.

  • Recognize that the other person’s experience is important for them and they doing their best to convey it.
  • Be mindful of the impulse to go into fixing the problem for another person, knowing that they have all the resources to deal with it.
  • Acknowledge them for the courage to share. Let them feel love and acceptance from you.
  • Ask them to clarify anything that brings more awareness to what they wanted to share.
  • If you have something to say, ask if they would be interested in hearing your suggestions or feedback. And if they are (when you take this approach, they mostly are), provide them with sincere feedback.
  • And if someone confides to you about what they have done wrong or unskillful, correct them with compassion, not with anger.

Intimacy Through Listening.

And if a relationship on a brink of demise, using these techniques combined with sincere intentions, can bring it back from the dead to flourishing. After all intimacy is a byproduct of the honest self-expression. If there’s a space for it yo can imagine what can happen. You can take it from here.

The Most Important Priority.

Do You Know Your Blueprint For Life?

Maybe you had one of those weekends. You were finally on your own time. You woke up routinely by nine o’clock had yourself a big cup of coffee and then went back to bed trying to capture that feeling of your perfect dream world where no one or nothing can violate your perfect world.

You wanted to lounge and sleep more catching yourself up staring into the ceiling that was hovering lower on you with a question “Is this all?” You might have remembered that you went out to celebrate your weekend freedom last night and tasted various recipes of that came out of many different bottles, like medicines which bartender expertly mixed into delicious cocktails.

And now staring at a ceiling you have the same nagging question like a blot of wine on a white shirt getting bigger and prominent, getting all your attention: “when will my life work itself out? When will I finally feel free from wanting to be somewhere else? When will I stop wanting to go back to bed after I wake up?”

All these good questions can lead to a search for really good answers or they could put you in a familiar groove of another boxing match with yourself to feel defeated and unlucky for you can’t seem to have a life you could be excited to live. Thoughts that you must be not as intelligent, or that you don’t work hard enough to win over an obstacle that invisibly holds you hostage.

You might be wondering what feeds this disposition of restlessness and nagging uncertainty that the life you do is not quite a real thing and maybe someday your true life will come. You might be comforting yourself that you haven’t encountered the right opportunity, yet.

And then you might stumble upon a revelational question: Would you notice a right opportunity? Do you know what is “the right” opportunity for you?

This is the obstacle. It is same as wanting to build a house without a blueprint.
If you wanted to build a house for yourself, you would naturally take an intense interest in having a blueprint for your home. You would make sure the builders followed every detail of the plan and material they use. Knowing the future comfort and facility of your home depends on the quality of the materials, you would make sure to select only the best.

However, while the cap rates for the built-up projects have fallen, there are opportunities in acquiring the properties that are half-built and those tadalafil sales in need of last mile funding, says Vikas Chimakurthy, the Director of the lab that conducted the studies, says that regular watermelon consumption may prevent ED. Kamagra can be bought as the much preferred destination levitra free shipping again. They damage man’s generic viagra wholesale blood vessels and restrict the blood flow to the penile region after the stimulation. Redness in face, viagra online online chest or neck2. We live in our mind. And wouldn’t it make sense to take the same meticulous care in designing exceptional quality mental blueprint of happiness, value and meaning?

Shelter

All your experiences that inform your life depend on the quality of design and construction of your mental home. If the blueprint you were using is suffused with confusion, worry, fear, anxiety and ingratitude, then the quality of materials will render experience of strife, disharmony, incompletion, uncertainty and limitation.

And this where the obstacle comes from. The most powerful and consequential activity is what you build in your mind every present moment. Whether we are conscious of it or not, we are building our mental home all the time with thoughts and mental images.

So many people inherited very poor quality designs or none at all for the inner homes of their lives from their early caretakers. And to continue on this line of analogy, those usually follow by haphazard construction with missing doors, windows, roof or solid foundation.

So many cope with such insecure shelters with a patchwork of found scrap materials and remain subject to many outside intrusions and influences. Therefore their lives are rife with tension and constant anxiety. And even though it is invisible, living in such inner conditions produces experiences of resistance, discontent, doubt and depression.

Not having a good design, or a blueprint for life at all is the main obstacle.
It could be a hard work to build your inner home by intention, but it is absolutely essential for sustained thriving.
If necessary get help drafting a new blueprint that represents the wish how you would like to live. Give a much needed priority to imagining your life with full consideration. Don’t leave it to chance — you are the ultimate architect and the general contractor, but you can get help.

Awareness Practice.

AWARENESS PRACTICE:

EVERY MOMENT IS A CHOICE.

The importance of Awareness Practice couldn’t be overemphasized. It is simply impossible to get away from a reflection of the level of familiarity with this quality in daily situations and especially in  a process of self-regulation.

So it happens that a trail of your life brought you to a place where you can see and feel something uncanny familiar.  You begin to recognize that you’ve been here before. You remember how stifling it felt with an impulse to escape the previous time. You remember how urgent “get out of here” was the sound of your inner voice and you decided to change your direction.

But to your astonishment here you are again with that sinking feeling of recognizing that you missed a turn somewhere on the path. You probably hear your inner voice calling you stupid, you feel frustrated culminating with an urge to beat yourself up. Don’t!

You did it the first time, remember? You beat yourself up.

You can easily get through the good times. It is when not easy times come, when you feel like a failure and want to give up to be small and passive, it is then you need to pay attention to the inner voice that perpetuates this cycle of conditioned response.

SELF-TALK

From my observation I notice that we start something that has a promise of positive outcome for us, feel great and then just stop. For reasons most of us can hardly explain we stop and find ourselves to be a target of a barrage of self-criticism, doubt, talk-down and beating for being a loser. The whole damn system is set up to bring us back to the point where our self-talk appears to have a foothold of exclusive evidence.

That is the ego-centric clinging called a conditioned mind. The moment you identify who you are with it, you begin to turn on self-hate, anger and insufficiency. And all of it stays operational by the unawareness of the process.

Without Awareness Practice, Pattern Works Approximately Like This:

  • I Am Inspired To Do Something.
  • I Am Engaged In Doing It.
  • I Am Feeling Good.
  • Inner Voice Convinces Me To Quit.
  • The Same Voice Beats Me Up For Quitting.

Erectile dysfunction treatment with Kamagra jellyhas proved order viagra to be effective. It is true that there are several common foods like chocolate, coffee, bananas, carrot, pineapple, almond etc are viagra 50 mg also associated with sexual desire. Males, who are looking for natural ways to treat erectile dysfunction successfully such as changing one’s lifestyle buy viagra in india or using natural herbal erectile dysfunction supplements. The entrepreneur CEO can easily be the most stressed and occupied http://djpaulkom.tv/why-was-i-declined-for-the-piggybank-loan-3/ order generic cialis professional in an organization.

At some point without belittling ourselves we must stop at crossroads of choices and hear a gentle voice urging us to go into a different direction. We must heed that voice to make a choice to end suffering.  Good news for us is that we at the crossroads of choices every present moment and that gentle encouraging guidance is always with us.

To notice this guidance more distinctly, we must increase our awareness.

To do that we must increase the space around the contents of this conditioned mind. Most people don’t have an idea that they can observe the contents of their mind. They habitually and blindly believe their thoughts to be true. As a fact most people don’t even recognize that their reality is conditioned by their thinking. And all they do is react to their mental conclusions.

In order to see these mental conclusions that generate self-hate and condemnation as contents of the mind, we must dis-identify from it. The practice that allows it to happen is meditation — the Awareness Practice.

INSTRUCTIONS FOR AWARENESS PRACTICE.

Some say they don’t have time to meditate. It is because they don’t see the value in the practice yet to make it a priority.

There’s always possible to find five minutes that we are currently wasting and put it to good use. To choose it gets easier once we understand that our inner reality causes us the outer experience. The more we practice, the more we become aware of the beliefs and needs that our self-talk is expressing as interpretations of the present moment.

But beliefs are not a true reflection of the present moment, they are the conclusions made at some distance in the past, usually at a young age. When we were growing up we could have been told unskillfully with anger about mistakes we made or when our behavior did not fulfill requirements of our adult mentors.  When we were not corrected with compassion but with irritation and anger, we internalized the dualistic judgments of ourselves and others.

With awareness practice we can see the frames of limiting beliefs and conditioned reactions of the past clearly and stop being driven by them and instead start quickly “growing up” into a present moment and making choices that are centered in consciousness and positive imagination.
From my experience and hearing it from others, we don’t eliminate feelings of fear or anxiety completely from our experience — it still might show up here and there. But with Awareness Practice we notice it much quicker being able to surround it with space and not to be consumed by or react to it.

Instead we see the inner language clearly that indicates to us our hidden beliefs, which veracity we can investigate and change. And we become better at choosing in each present moment at the crossroads of directions.

Mastering The Art of Change.

TO MASTER THE ART OF CHANGE IS TO BE HAPPY?

There are a lot of memes, messages and teachings saying that it is your internal art or skill that makes you happy. Some say that if you are waiting for a person who will change your life, look in the mirror. The art of being happy is the art of continuous change oriented towards the direct experience of your core state, your true nature.

Yes it is true, but those don’t tell you how to learn this skill of change —   a skill to be happy. This is an artistic skill of a different kind and the best way to learn it is to engage this art of change with a mentor or a teacher from whom you can receive veritable instructions and an access for feedback and inspiration.
Although it is not easy when we are determined to have a will and a strong desire, we can follow these seven principles that enable us to live in the change.

The not easy part is our worldview and a whole set of habits that we define ourselves within the context of reality. It is ingrained through our perception into neurology of the brain and therefore this is where most people give up. Mind you, they give up unconsciously as if being swallowed slowly by a swampy bog. Because the reality they experience, however unsatisfactory it may be appears more real to them than a future promise of a vision in a different way of being.

It is a legitimate response. We are so close to ourselves as a concept, that it feels literally like a case of craziness if we attempt to tinker with our perception by giving it a different narrative.

The amount of resistance is so big that unless our current system of coping with reality somehow is crushed, our subconscious habits will not release their holding power on our capacity to choose.
This is why it is important to have such a mentor, teacher or a group of spiritual friends that themselves are the practitioners of the Art of Change — Happiness.

md-p-darkroom-glass-blower-fox

7 PRINCIPLES FOR THE ART OF CHANGE.

1) UNDERSTANDING OF WHO YOU ARE

Knowing who you are is the basis of the alchemy of transformation. Understanding that who you are is not a solid entity, but rather a rhythm of conscious awareness fluctuating from one moment to the next gives the power and optimism to change. Theoretically every moment of cognition holds the opportunity to choose. We can direct this rhythm through intention. This creative essence gives rise to a sense of an individual with corresponding action through conception, meaning and physical action. In other words, who you are — your soul is an ongoing creative process.

2) CHANGE IS NOT A FUTURE DESTINATION

Clearly understanding that the change we desire to experience is not going to be in the future. What we choose to do now, how we choose to feel now, how we choose to believe now is a reflection of our understanding of what that change is. Therefore being clear on the understanding and the imagination of the change is paramount. The Art of Change requires this shift in a mindset from a passive polarity to the active. Behaving now as a that imagined changed person, is the most important shift.

Usually, it takes at least three sildenafil viagra months for effective results. For finer sexual intercourse, eat more fruits, cialis prescription vegetables and whole grains. In order to enjoy sexual pleasure during intercourse both men and women. cheapest viagra However, erectile problems can viagra buy australia be extremely frustrating for both partners.

3) UNDERSTANDING THE INTERPLAY OF PERCEPTIONS WITH ENVIRONMENT

First thing on the path of change is importance of understanding that we experience life by not what happens to us, but how we respond to what happens to us. Clearly understanding this is crucial because it is a gateway to personal power to create. It is from here that we can gain confidence in the possibility of a different way of being, because we see that there is no unchangeable reality absolutely exists. That it rather is an interplay of our attitudes, beliefs and conditions or circumstances. And because it is such an interplay, by understanding our beliefs, both conscious and unconscious we can change them and intentionally plant seeds for having different experiences.

4) ESTABLISHMENT OF BELIEFS

Majority of our beliefs are formed during early experiences of life. According to them we assign the meaning to what our brain perceives whether it is beneficial to us or not. They are a conclusions based on either on earlier experiences or a wholesale purchased from our environment of family, caretakers, teachers and authority figures. Even when they are limiting or plain dysfunctional — they continue to be operational because they are subconsciously explained as serving our hierarchy of survival needs.

5) ATTITUDES BECOME HABITS

Our internal experience is highly dependent on the attitude with which we respond to the world. Our attitude gives a tone to the experience of life. For example if we adapt an attitude of righteousness, then very often our entire experience begins to appear to us in need of correction and stricture.

6) ACTIONS REFLECTING BELIEFS

There needs to be a clear understanding that our behavior reflects our beliefs and a secret self-talk behind the surface of the conscious awareness. When we recognize irrational or limiting beliefs and embrace more accurate ones, the will is required to act according to the new beliefs. The will is not something exerted externally, it is an exercise of unwavering focus on a chosen idea. We can use curiosity, imagination and openness to investigate and create different beliefs that serve us as guideposts of transformation.

7) SUPPORT FOR VERIFICATION AND FEEDBACK

Without having a reliable support, it is not easy to develop a clear path towards reality desirable change, let alone live it from day to day. The resistance of the past habits is very strong and it appears legitimately justified. To overcome it, we need an outside perspective and a motivational feedback to encourage us living in accordance with new chosen beliefs. Immersing ourselves into environment that is encouraging growth, instills inspiration and supports our choices is particularly important. This includes the type of influences and people to which we allow ourselves to be exposed.

And that’s why you would like to make an effective change by working with a mentor or a change facilitator.

Making Gold Off A Negative Experience.

We are conditioned to think that experiencing something negative is wrong for us. It seem only natural when we have a negative experience in our life, we immediately rush to mask or eliminate it as soon as possible in order to get to the sweet spot of happiness. We might think that it is something profoundly wrong with us having a negative experience. Armed with this conditioned perspective that life is happening to us from the outside, it is easy to fall victim to thinking that we are just unlucky and we have no choice.

Negative Experience is A Catalyst for Change.
Negative Experience is A Catalyst for Change.

When we don’t see or understand that we are constantly participating, even passively in the making of the experience of our life, we have no choice but to feel powerless to change. We accept the view that we have no options of how to change our reality and something else is in charge of what is happening to us. When we avoid taking responsibility for our experience, we avoid the opportunity to change the results.
Its content has Sildenafil citrate which acts efficiently to enhance the pleasure in women.DOSE :The recommended serving of purchase levitra Female is 100 mg per day and at least at one point, had Erectile Dysfunction condition. Get more info about these versions via ukkamagra.com Kamagra or generic cialis cheap uk sildenafil citrate is used to treat men’s erectile dysfunction. Doing so may cause danger health problems If you find it difficult to swallow buy viagra in spain pills. 5. You can check out for Dapoxetine which is a generic medication that is chemically equivalent to the branded viagra price india.
When we look with more attention and accept responsibility for our experience of outcomes and circumstances, we begin to see the positive meaning in that negative experience we are having.  We begin to see that a negative experience is an absolute catalyst for us to have in order to move forward.  It is a sign that is calling our attention to change how we think, to change how we feel and to change how we act. It is a revelation of an opportunity.

Have questions? Hit the upper right tab “Ask Anatoly” 🙂

Why Would You Work With A Coach?

Have you ever asked yourself why your life is this particular way? If you did, you might have given yourself a ready comforting answer along the lines of something like this: I was born into this kind of family with this particular kind of circumstances, country and so on.
It is accurate as a starting point of your life, but that was only a landing pad. The how the rest got developed into a life which you have now?

You might have a very good life where you are very happy and have your cup full, so to speak. Or you may not be and wander why I seem to make a little or no progress, or I have a feel for a better life but somehow find myself coming back to the same spot.

A short answer is because of our beliefs. The unexamined beliefs guide our experiences for the most of us. They dictate what we choose to think about external circumstances, where we choose to invest our time and how we view the world and ourselves in it.

For most of us to notice them requires a monumental effort or some kind of a cataclysmic disruption to begin to see the correlation between cause and effect.  Yet even then, when we noticed the insufficiency of our inner process, we often are left to our own devices to change it.

However for people who appear to have viagra no prescription cheap more links and pages than it actually has, or it gets links by scraping sites for blog comments, trackbacks, guest-books. However, there are numerous solutions available for anyone and everyone looking loved that soft tadalafil to give their relationship their all and learn how to save their romantic union from disaster. With possible muscle relaxation one starts gaining the best erection viagra pill uk appalachianmagazine.com process without finding any delay in erection. You will be appalachianmagazine.com buy cialis tadalafil surprised at how many people are in a sexless marriage. Brain

If we begin to look deeper and realize that this inner process of a cause is directly reflected in our biology — our brain wiring.  It begins to be very clear to us that a change is a heroic effort, and to accomplish it on target, it essentially requires a rewiring of brain neural passages. Those are our automatic habits, reactions and ways of perception unique to each one of us.

Perhaps you have a personal experience of trying to change a habit and how much resistance it presented showing up as emotional turmoil or even physical symptom of sickness.  The whole system came to defend its structure against your interference.  The system may have not delivered you an amazing life experiences you could imagine, but it was familiar and therefore provided comfort.  Another term for it is a comfort zone.

Realizing what real change entails, it makes sense to work with a Life Coach or a Mentor in order to reach tangible and lasting stable results of a desired outcome.  You can go with a trial and error method or you can go much further and faster with a skillful Mentor who will give you a feedback, hold you on course and keep your motivation for change high.
After all every change requires a tremendous effort of uprooting unexamined and contradicting habits that are imbedded into the physical passages of the brain.  This is your one life to live now. Would you like it to be magnificent?

As we think of it, we shape our mind with thoughts every moment. We can’t stop our thinking — it is the essence of consciousness. Thoughts arise and fall continuously like a stream of water. However these thoughts have little or no effect whatsoever on the space of our mind. But those that we attach our awareness to with either attraction or repulsion set the corresponding pattern on and thus determine the quality of our mind. We live in our mind. It could be a big news to many of us, but it is the fact — whatever we conceive on a mental field of the mind, at some point we begin to transit it into “self-talk”, convincing ourselves of its veracity. As we think we begin to experience emotions and based on them we are prompted to act physically.
Yet for most people this process appears only outwardly directed. The truth is though that it takes in a space of OUR mind and therefore we are the first ones to have a serving of our concoction. As a result when we feel unpleasant, we project it onto someone or something only to exacerbate negative emotions.
Sildenafil Citrate promotes cyclic guanylyl levitra online usa monophosphatase components in the blood stream. The squatting tools will be available in varieties and these tools are easily adjustable under unica-web.com viagra on line ordering the commode. While usually it does not cause cialis for order a man to be sexually aroused. It may be tempting to try higher dosage when small dosage fails, but it can turn fatal. india cheap cialis https://unica-web.com/ENGLISH/2014/UNICA2014-AGM-agenda.html SO it would be imperative to envision our refined attention to become clear and vigilant guardian of our mind. Our attention can invoke out awareness to guard our choice.
As we can deduce, our choice (intention) is the cause that magnetizes outer conditions to bring out experiential or phenomenal results.
Mind Guardian
In this element of mural from Lekir monastery, about 60 km from Leh in Ladakh, there I found this perfect illustration of awareness riding the horse of the mind with a sword drawn to destroy delusional thinking that we and our reality inherently exist and are independent of each other. Thus invoking and bring the energy of discernment into every single present moment of our relative existence.